never had i imagined that i'd experience an apocalypse in my lifetime i've kind of felt numb as if none of this is actually happening it's strange i do not know what i am swimming in but the thing is i don't think anybody else knows either i thought it'd be something straight out of Will Smith's I Am Legend (that’s impossible! we don’t live in a movie) but i don't have a german shepherd as a guard dog nor do i have an M-16 in audible disbelief it seemed too absurd to be real and yet here we are so desensitized blood-red clouds and orange sky cast an apocalyptic glow the line between fiction and real life seems to be increasingly blurry I don't think any child would be able to fully process the reality see the world break down through a screen I've stopped being surprised i don't know those people, and they don't know me not being able to see the beautiful faces of random strangers lasting negative effects beyond my comprehension one of the weirdest experiences of my life the virus is such an invisible enemy foucault is turning over in his grave the sick have to now be tended by the sick there are rules in place every time i wore a mask i felt suffocated, the strings attached to my ears felt like they were going to rip them off, every now and then I'd pull my mask off just for a few seconds to catch some fresh air uncertainty and danger apocalyptic emotionswhat is next? only time can tell. our world has been turned upside-down realizing with horror what a mess our country is in i'm still numb from last night these people willingly choose to be ignorant i almost want to laugh at the irony Our democracy he told America we can breathe again a weight had been lifted. decorum order reason safety conscience a strong sense of relief why does it feel disappointing? is this any better? how much more violence can we take? hasn’t affected everyone equally they want justice in their own hands i've started allowing myself to feel optimistic for the first time i feel like the world is somehow different than it was a week ago i've really been caught up in my own world i wonder how much of me has changed how life is going to be after the damage will not reverse “there is so much that needs to be fixed” but now i feel as though i can possibly just maybe think about what comes after responsibility to the present not a panacea i thought that i could rest easy it's weird being home. re-entering the real world purple bubble i'm more isolated now than i was then my place in it maybe i'll love it even more because i've been without it for so long oh well how helpless i feel falling apart not to be negative or anything but slight glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel return to normal (or close to normal) the beginning of the end, a physical manifestation of futurity
all will soon be revealed
compiled from our collective “fieldnotes” discussion board